Meet the instructor: Cathy
Putney antenatal instructor, Cathy Sage, has supported thousands of parents through her classes and her work as a Baby Feeding Specialist. She sat down to talk to us about her rewarding career so far and her first book, Breast, Bottle or Both.
Photo: Morgan PughYou’ve been a Bump & Baby Club teacher for 11 years now! What first led you to antenatal teaching?
Before I worked as an antenatal teacher I worked in environmentalism - geology, chemistry and geography - and what I loved most in my various roles was facilitating and teaching. I loved being with people and I always enjoyed the counselling side of my work. Then, when I had my own children, I retrained as an antenatal teacher.
What do you enjoy most about teaching antenatal classes?
I love having new groups of expectant parents coming through my classes and seeing them bond and make friends. It's just the most rewarding thing when I get photographs a year later of all the babies and parents who've made really firm friendship groups. They share amazing times together.
I have been living and working in Putney for years and it's been lovely to have a real sense of community here. I see many of my group members on the streets. I had my own children here, who are grown up now. I made lots of friends through the antenatal classes I took and we're still friends, we still meet up. Our children went to school and college together, it's very special.
You do your own private one-to-one infant feeding work, as well as volunteering - how does this feed into and inform your antenatal teaching?
It’s all just trying to help people and that’s what I’ve really enjoyed throughout my career - trying to make a difference one way or another. But there’s nothing quite so direct as ‘this mum and this baby, right now.’ I love giving support in the moment when it’s needed. I find it incredibly compelling. But you’re always doing the same work in a way, whether it's a group or one-to-one. You’re listening. Listening to what’s being said, and not said. And I do teach in a very collaborative way, my classes are very interactive.
How have your classes evolved over time?
Respecting the knowledge and experience that’s already in the group is something that I’ve learnt and developed over time. More and more people come to classes having done a lot of research themselves. When helping people navigate contradictory information, staying evidence-based is really important. Even something like burping your baby… some books say you’ve got to burp your baby for 40 minutes, some books say 5 minutes, some say, ‘just don’t worry about it.’ It can be really confusing for parents. I am also keen to let parents know that they don’t have to do everything perfectly.
I have become more confident over time and am a bit less phased by things. I’ve acquired more dolls and knitted boobs over the years! One thing that’s changed is people with their smartphones - now I can share photos and videos with groups that way within the classes.
One thing that hasn’t changed is that I’ve always made my classes and my one-to-one work judgement-free spaces, so I start with that as an introduction. And I like to ask upfront what people’s questions are, so I get a sense of where they’re coming from at the very beginning.
Is there anything in particular that you specialise in within the world of infant feeding?
Yes. As well as breastfeeding I’ve trained in bottle feeding. It's an area where people can feel a bit lost because it's hard to figure out a pattern, especially with mixed feeding. People find that very challenging and sometimes they really question their bottle feeding technique. I also see people whose babies are refusing bottles. Working with both breast and bottle feeding is about observing and respecting people’s individual life experiences and working out where feeding fits into that for them.
I get lots of questions in my classes like, ‘When can I introduce a bottle?’ and, ‘Can my partner help?’ It can be a lovely experience for both parents. I love when you can problem-solve. You can’t always fix their situation, but usually you can talk about why the situation has happened and make adjustments and get their partner involved in feeding. What I really enjoy is when it all starts working, whether it's breast or bottle, and you just see everyone kind of let go.
And now you’ve written a book to help people with this, congratulations! Can you tell me a bit more about when you started writing it, what the initial idea for it was and who it's for?
I probably started thinking about writing it 3 years ago. I would start and stop but then people would then say something about the work, and I would start again. I’m really proud of it, and I’m so grateful for the women that get to share their stories and their photos.
The book is written as a series of questions and answers based on the kind of questions I get asked every single day. I answer the question simply at first, and then go into more details after that. For example, ‘Is this thrush?’, ‘Can I breastfeed with tattoos?’ ‘Are my boobs normal?’ - all those sorts of questions are there. Then it talks about the early days and what to expect, then it dives into milk supply issues and questions about tongue-tie and jaundice, and questions for mum, like, ‘Why are my nipples bleeding?’
There’s a chapter on twins and triplets and there’s tons on expressing and storing milk and bottle feeding. I also have a chapter at the end about emotions, ‘Why don’t I feel normal?’ ‘Is it ok to not love my baby?’ ‘Can I breastfeed with postnatal depression?’ These are the sort of things that people tell or ask me, but don’t speak about with each other.
I think that’s why Iwrote the book. For those moments at 3am when people can feel very alone, and it feels like it's all going wrong - I wrote it for them.
